Hunting Dusk
by laurelanderich
Summary: This is New Moon but from Edward's perspective. He tells his tale as he watches Bella go through her birthday and her heartbreak and what it is that he does whilst he is out on his own. Please R&R.
1. Birthday

**A/N: Okay so this is my first fanfic that i have ever given to the public. My friend Raven, another fanfic writer has asked me to publish this for you. So here i give you Hunting Dusk. My version of New Moon but from Edward's perspective. Please be kind while reading. I promise it will do well...maybe. Enjoy. I own nothing. These characters belong to Stephenie Meyer, I borrow them for this.**

* * *

Hunting Dusk

Chapter One: Birthday

I sat in the wooden rocker and watched her peacefully, reveling at the fact that she was still mine, no matter how miraculously. Even though she had almost gotten killed because of me, I had promised her. I had told her that I would be here for her, so long as it was best. So instead of ruining the moment I stared at her beautiful face. She was smiling, so I knew she was dreaming of me. Suddenly I heard someone outside. Alice.

_Edward, come on, you shouldn't be there. _She thought. I sighed and got up. I climbed out the window with one last glance at Bella's sleeping form. Then I fell from the window and stood in front of Alice.

"What is it Alice?" I asked, irate. I really did enjoy watching Bella.

She laughed quietly. "Give it a rest, Edward. You'll see her in a few hours. Now come, we need to finish her present."

I smiled and ran home. As I raced through the blurring greens, I thought of Bella's stern warning to me just a few weeks ago. We were sitting on her couch one-day after school, and the casual conversation turned towards her birthday. She then ordered me to promise not to do anything for her birthday. No presents, no parties. Even if I was the one who promised, it never stopped Alice from breaking into her party plans. Alice was relentless and would stop at nothing, so I helped her with the small detail of the perfect gift.

I walked casually through the front door when I reached our large house in the meadow. Alice walked in behind me. We both headed to her computer.

"Okay," Alice said; opening up the file labeled _Bella's present_. "Is that everything you wanted on the disk?"

I scanned the list and saw that the two most important compositions were right at the top. "Yes, it's all there and I think she'll enjoy it."

She nodded. I watched as she tweaked the arrangement so Bella's lullaby and Esme's song were the first two on the CD. A few minutes later she produced a silver disk. I handed her a clear jewel case. Alice quickly wrapped it in silver paper. I looked out the window; the sun had just risen.

"Get dressed," she ordered.

I rolled my eyes, but I moved to the staircase. I stopped when Esme walked down.

"Where were you?" she asked. It was natural; I hadn't been at Bella's in a while.

"Dreaming," I laughed.

Esme smiled and touched my shoulder as I walked past her. Her thoughts were focused on how happy I have been. She was excited that this might get further. I sighed, I couldn't ruin Bella's future like that. I still needed to become strong enough to leave. I shook my head and walked slowly up the stairs, lost in thought. My room was on the third floor, and so I moved faster. In my mind, I knew that the sooner I arrived the sooner I'd get to see Bella. As soon as I had fresh clothes on, I went back downstairs. Alice, I could hear, was already in my Volvo. I sighed and headed to the garage.

"So impatient," I muttered climbing in.

Alice rolled her eyes but otherwise ignored me. I drove quickly down the serpentine lane. The ride was quick and quiet. I parked in the usual spot and stepped out of my car. Shutting the door, I leaned up against the driver's side. Alice joined me, and so we waited. In a matter of minutes, Bella's truck was heard chugging sluggishly down the street. When she first pulled in her brow was creased in despair, but her eyes found me, and something else took place. Her eyes shifted from me to Alice and then her eyes narrowed in anger. She had spotted the gift. Bella climbed out of her truck and slammed the door in obvious irritation. She walked towards us slowly. Alice peeled away from the car and moved to greet Bella.

"Happy birthday, Bella!" Alice chirped.

"Shh!" Bella looked around the lot nervously. I smiled slightly as I read the fear of attention flash across her face.

They started to walk towards me. "Do you want to open your present now or later?" Alice asked, overly eager.

"No presents," Bella insisted in a whisper.

Alice grimaced. "Okay…later, then." She changed the subject before Bella protest more. "Did you like the scrapbook your mom sent you? And the camera from Charlie?"

Bella sighed. "Yeah. They're great," she mumbled.

"_I _think it's a nice idea," Alice protested. "You're only a senior once. Might as well document the experience."

"How many times have _you _been a senior?" Bella retorted.

Alice's eyes narrowed. "That's different."

They had finally reached me. Bella's beauty and scent hit me at the same time. So I was slightly staggered as I reached for her warm hand. She placed her hand in mine instantly. I was still curious as to how I deserved her. But I tended to forget sad trivial notes like that when I was with her. I squeezed her hand gently. I stared into her warm brown eyes, and she stared back. Her heart stuttered as she looked at me. I smiled at her. I reached my free hand to her lips. I traced the shape of her soft lips carefully.

"So, as discussed, I am not allowed to wish you happy birthday, is that correct?" I said, still staring into her deep eyes.

"Yes. That is correct," she replied stubbornly.

"Just checking." I removed my hand from her lips and ran it through my hair. "You _might_ have changed your mind. Most people seem to enjoy things like birthdays and gifts."

Alice laughed, slightly peeved at Bella's nonchalance. "Of course you'll enjoy it. Everyone is supposed to be nice to you today and give you your way, Bella. What's the worst that could happen?"

Bella sighed and answered Alice's rhetorical question. "Getting older," she whispered.

My smile froze on my face. Of all the things she would want on her birthday, she wants eternal damnation. Alice noticed my freeze and she didn't like it. Of all my family members, Alice was the most eager for Bella to become one of us. She still held the vision of her and Bella as immortal friends.

"Eighteen isn't very old," Alice said lightly. "Don't women usually wait till they're twenty-nine to get upset over birthdays?"

"It's older than Edward," Bella pointed out.

I sighed. I honestly was starting to understand her better. I had guessed right about what she was thinking. And she obviously had the word impasse flashing in her mind. The memory of that conversation in the Phoenix hospital was trying to surface but I paid closer attention to Alice and Bella.

_Honestly, Edward…_

"Technically," Alice said. "Just by one little year, though."

Bella's lip pouted out slightly. She was quiet for a long while. Probably thinking of a way to get what she wanted. I was going to have to hold strong against Alice, and the selfish inside that wanted to give her what she wanted. Bella would without a doubt trick it out of me. But I was already formulating a plan. One way I could use her selflessness against her. Prove how much everyone needs her, alive and mortal. That was another reason. I didn't want to break her pure soul. Before I could plan more Alice continued.

"What time will you be at the house?"

Bella's head tilted to the side. "I didn't know I had plans to be there."

_You've got to be kidding me. _"Oh, be fair, Bella!" Alice complained. "You aren't going to ruin all our fun like that, are you?"

"I thought my birthday was about what _I _want," Bella countered.

I smiled, and decided it was time I intervened. "I'll get her from Charlie's right after school," I promised.

"I have to work," Bella protested resentfully. She must have thought I'd take her side. Or maybe she thought I wouldn't have broken the promise. Even though I truly didn't.

A huge grin flashed across Alice's face. "You don't, actually. I already spoke to Mrs. Newton about it. She's trading your shifts. She said to tell you 'Happy Birthday.'"

"I–I still can't come over," Bella scrambled, looking for some kind of excuse. "I, well, I haven't watched _Romeo and Juliet_ yet for English."

Alice snorted. "You have _Romeo and Juliet _memorized."

"B-but Mr. Berty said we needed to see it performed to fully appreciate it – that's how Shakespeare intended it to be presented," she stuttered. Her lies amused me. Probably because they were never really any good.

I rolled my eyes at her.

"You've already seen the movie." Alice's accusation was matter-of-factly.

"But not the nineteen-sixties version. Mr. Berty said it was the best." Bella continued with her lie, well half lie.

Alice's thoughts and expression lost their smug tone. She glared at Bella. _This is ridiculous_. She complained internally. "This can be easy, or this can be hard, Bella, but one way or the other–"

I cut her off, and countered her thoughts of forced attendance. "Relax, Alice. If Bella wants to watch the movie, then she can. It's her birthday."

Bella's smiled smugly now. "So there."

I tried to keep the smile off my face as I continued my counter for Alice. "I'll bring her over around seven. That will give you more time to set up."

_Thank you!_ She chanted in her head. She laughed, and Bella's face fell slightly. "Sounds good," Alice giggled. "See you tonight, Bella! It'll be fun, you'll see." She smiled widely, exposing all her teeth.

We watched Alice head to class. Bella began to protest. "Edward, please–"

I placed my finger lightly on her warm lips. "Let's discuss this later," I reasoned. "We're going to be late for class."

She didn't argue anymore. We walked to English and took our seats in the back of the room. A small smile lit her face as she sat next to me. That triggered my long earned frustration towards her strange silence. I tried, hopelessly, for the thousandth time, to hear her thoughts. But still, nothing. As I concentrated, Mike's ignorant thoughts burned me.

_How can she still be with him? He can't possibly be that, good. And the way he kisses her…_his thoughts trailed off into a shudder as he thought of me kissing Bella the other day at lunch.

I bit back a smile. I had only kissed her to annoy him. Lunch was awkward for Bella, and it was probably easier when Alice and I were gone on those sunny days that held us barred into secrecy. She was always torn. I had no problem with the company. Except for when Mike and Jessica start up with their arrogance towards Bella. Angela Weber and Ben Cheney were the best for Bella, in my eyes. They were peaceful and full of love, for each other and Bella. Maybe she too could have that, if I weren't around. I shook my head, casting aside the thought.

I looked at Bella again. She was so beautiful, even more so than when she sleeps. Her wide eyes framed by a thick, black fringe of lashes glanced between Mr. Berty and my face. Her face was flushed the most intoxicating red with her harmless fury. She was mad that I had allowed Alice to throw a party that I was making her go to. I wished I could have said, _let's do what you want. _I would follow Bella wherever she went. I tried to pay attention to class but I could only focus on Bella.

* * *

**So that was the first chapter. I am working as fast as I can. If ya'll wanna check out more of my work just click on over to . it is my website of magical wonders where my own characters bend to my will. Muah ha ha ha... :)**


	2. Killing Romeo

A/N: Sorry about this being posted so late I am so busy all the time with school and work and writing my novel and my internet crashed….honestly I wonder how people do this. So please be kind and patient not that Edward is the selfish bastard…*sigh* All I can hope is you like this. It took a lot to write this chapter. The next one will hurt. I know it hurt me….

**Stephenie Meyer owns all of this I just flipped the perspective.**

Chapter 2: Killing Romeo

I chuckled watching Alice drag Bella around during lunch. Alice would not shut up when it came to Bella's birthday. My eyes met a pair of desperate brown ones. She was pleading me to keep Alice down.

"Alice enough, Bella can only take so much."

Alice sighed. "Fine but this is far from over, _brother_."

I smirked and pulled Bella next to me. Lunch went extremely slow. I listened to Alice and Angela Weber talk rapidly with one another. It was strange how welcoming Bella's friends were to Alice and myself. I suppose we are not as scary as we thought we were. However, every so often their thoughts would fill with fear if we smiled too widely or moved too swiftly. Bella, however, has no fear whatsoever. Not even if I bring myself to hold her in my arms and kiss her soft, pouting…

I shook the thought. Bella stood up. I smiled and walked with her to our next class. The day went quickly. We stood outside of her truck and I held open her door on the passenger's side. She looked at me curiously. I intended to drive her to her house. Alice was driving my Volvo home. Bella's arms folded stubbornly across her chest.

"It's my birthday, don't I get to drive?"

She looked cute, pouting in the rain. "I'm pretending it's not your birthday, just as you wished."

"If it's not my birthday, then I don't have to go to your house tonight," she smirked, her voice trailing off.

I matched her grin and closed the door walking to the driver's side. "Happy birthday."

She shushed me climbing in. As we drove to her house, I fiddled with the radio. The reception was appalling. There was a crinkling static sound emitting from the speakers. I shook my head.

"Your radio has horrible reception."

She frowned at me. "You want a nice radio? Drive your own car," she snapped.

A smiled twitched at the corner of my lips. Bella had a kitten's temper. She may be angry but that made her all the more beautiful. She pulled up to the curb of Chief Swan's house. I grabbed her face gently in my hands. Handling her softly with the tips of my fingers. I had to be extremely careful. One false move and I could destroy her.

"You should be in a good mood, today of all days," I was so close to smell the beautiful scent of freesia.

"And if I don't want to be in a good mood," she breathed.

"Too bad."

I leaned forward and her heart started to race. I pressed my lips softly to hers. Her sweet scent filled my senses. I felt an instant fire burst in my chest. My heart of ice felt like it had been shocked back to life. Where her skin touched mine I felt flames. A burning electric sense of my life and her love. She wrapped her arms around my neck. I smiled. Carefully, I pulled her arms from around my neck. I pulled away wrapping her arms across her chest I placed one last, small kiss on her lips.

"Be good, please."

She held her hand over her thumping heart. The hyperactive rhythm of her pulse. "Do you think I'll ever get better at this?" she whispered. "That my heart might someday stop trying to jump out of my chest whenever you touch me?"

Hell no, I thought smugly. "I really hope not."

She rolled her eyes at my comment. "Lets go watch the Capulets and Montagues hack each other up, all right?"

"Your wish, my command."

Bella insisted on watching Romeo and Juliet from 1969. I had always found the movie to be poorly acted and that they did not grasp the aspect of star-crossed love. The latter opinion was now personal as I too found myself in love with what was forbidden. Bella the old tape into her VCR as I lay quietly on her couch. She sat on the edge of the couch. I wrapped my arms lightly around her waist and pulled her against my chest. She snuggled against me. I pulled the afghan blanket from the back of the couch and wrapped it around her so she would freeze in my arms, against my frigid body.

"You know I've never had much patience with Romeo," I said as the movie started.

"What's wrong with Romeo?" she huffed.

Interesting, I offended her. "Well, first of all, he's in love with this Rosaline – don't you think it makes him seem a little fickle? And then, a few minutes after their wedding, he kills Juliet's cousin. That's not very brilliant. Mistake after mistake. Could he have destroyed his own happiness any more thoroughly?"

She sighed heavily and looked at me seriously. "Do you want me to watch this alone?"

I smiled playing with her arm. My fingers tracing patterns on the skin softly. "No, I'll mostly be watching you anyway. Will you cry?

"Probably," she said turning her attention to the television. "If I'm paying attention."

"I won't distract you then," I promised, kissing her hair. Her breathing hitched slightly.

I watched her as she stared at the movie. I whispered each of Romeo's lines to her. She shivered unconsciously. Tears finally filled her eyes as the fair Juliet rose from her fake death to find the prude Romeo dead on the ground. I wished death was that easy to get. Being an undead monster, I was unable to eve so much as hurt myself.

"I'll admit," I whispered, drying tears from her eyes with the lock of hair that was twisted in my fingers. "I do sort of envy him here."

"She's very pretty."

What was that supposed to mean? She's very _pretty_. I scoffed. "I don't envy him the _girl_ – just the ease of the suicide. You humans have it so _easy_! All you have to is throw down one tiny vial of plant extracts…"

She gasped interrupting me. "What?"

"It's something I had to think about once, and I knew from Carlisle's experience that it wouldn't be simple. I'm not even sure how many ways Carlisle tried to kill himself in the beginning…after he realized what he'd become…and he's clearly still in excellent health." How could I ever kill myself when she died? I would find a way. And maybe what I thought would work.

She turned to stare at me. She was angry, upset and worried. "What are you talking about?" she growled. "What do you mean, this is something you had to think about once?"

"Last spring, when you were…nearly killed…." I took a deep breath as my chest tightened thinking of when we ran from James. "Of course I was focused on finding you alive, but part of me was making contingency plans. Like I said; it isn't as easy for me as it is for a human."

Her eyes glazed over as she thought about what I said. Probably remembering her escapade with the sadistic vampire. Her fingers absently trailed over the scar from James and myself. I almost killed her sucking out his venom. Almost drained her of her own blood. She shook her head clearing her mind.

"Contingency plans?"  
"Bella, I wasn't going to live without you." I rolled my eyes. "But I wasn't sure how to do it. I knew Emmett and Jasper would never help…so I was thinking maybe I could to Italy and do something to provoke the Volturi."

They cherish their city and keep it "vampire-free" if said vampire exposes them. I would beg them to kill me when Bella was dead. I would not, could not, live without her. She was my reason for living. It scared me to think of a world without her.

"What _is _a Volturi?"

"The Volturi are an old, very rich, very powerful family of our kind. They are the closet thing in my world to royalty, I suppose. Carlisle lived with them briefly in his earlier years, in Italy . You remember the story?"

"Of course I remember." She thought briefly about the story, remembering.

"Anyway, you don't irritate the Volturi," I whispered. "Not unless you want to die or whatever it is we do."

She grabbed my face roughly into her warm hands. "You must never, ever, ever think of anything like that again! No matter what might happen to me, you are _not allowed_ to hurt yourself!"

"I'll never put you in danger, so it's a moot point."

"_Put_ me in danger! I thought we established that all this bad luck stuff was all my fault? How dare you even think like that?"

I frowned. "What would you do if the situation was reversed?"

"That is not the same thing," she argued.

I laughed.

"What is something did happen to you? Would you want me to go and off myself?"

Bella, killing herself. No that couldn't happen. That should never happen. "I guess I see your point…a little. But what would I do without you?"

"Whatever you were doing before I came along and complicated your existence."

I sighed. As if I could do that. "You make that sound easy."

"It should, I'm not really that interesting."

I frowned deeper. She had to see reason. "Moot point," was all I said instead of arguing. The cruiser pulled around the corner. I sat up quickly pulling Bella with me and moving her inches away from me, so we weren't touching.

"Charlie?" she whispered.

I smiled. Charlie pulled up to the driveway. His thoughts were calm and happy. Focused only on Bella and her birthday. He was even more excited not seeing my car. He didn't get his hopes up. He really didn't like me when I landed his daughter in the hospital. He blames everything that has happened to Bella, as he should. Charlie walked in carrying cardboard pizza box.

"Hey kids," he said cheerily. He smiled at Bella. "I thought you would like to take a break from cooking on your birthday. Hungry?"  
"Sure, thanks Dad."

They ate in the kitchen. Charlie always found it weird that I never ate but he never said anything. When they were done I decided to act. Charlie had nothing planned except for a game, but Bella didn't know that.

"Do you mind if I borrow Bella for the evening?"  
"That's fine – the Mariners are playing the Sox tonight," Charlie answered. "So I won't be any kind of company…Here."

Charlie threw Bella her camera from Renee. But Bella being Bella, dropped it. I reached down and snagged it before it could touch the ground.

"Nice save," Charlie said. "If they're doing something fun at the Cullens' tonight, Bella, you should take some pictures. You know how your mother gets – she'll be wanting to see the pictures faster than you can take them."

Memories. "Good idea, Charlie." I handed Bella the camera.

As soon as it was in her hands, she turned it on me and took a picture. "It works."

"That's good. Tell Alice I say hi. She hasn't been here in a while," Charlie said relaxing.

Bella rolled her eyes. "Dad, it's been three days. I'll tell her."

"You kids have fun tonight." He was slowly making his way towards the television. _Maybe I can catch highlights of the afternoon games before tonight's game. I hope the Twins lost. Yankees are doing great this season. _**(AN: I have nothing against the Twins my home team and i'm not a Yanks fan but this is Charlie)**

I smiled and pulled Bella from the room. At her truck, I helped her get into the passenger's side. She didn't argue this time. I got in and drove north. I pressed on the gas, urging the truck faster. The truck groaned as it barely went fifty-five.

"Take it easy," she reprimanded me.

"You know what you would love? A nice little Audi coupe. Very quiet, lots of power…"

"There's nothing wrong with my truck. And speaking of expensive nonessentials, if you know what's good for you, you didn't spend any money on birthday presents."

"Not a dime." The disk cost me a penny and the music is my own.

"Good."

"Can you do me a favor?" I looked at her softly.

"That depends on what it is."

I sighed and looked down seriously. "Bella, the last real birthday any of us had was Emmett in 1935. Cut us a little slack, and don't be too excited. They're all very excited." Emmett and Alice more than anyone.

She frowned. "Fine, I'll behave."

"I should probably warn you…"

"Please do."

"When I say they're all excited…I mean _all _of them."

"Everyone? I thought Emmett and Rosalie were in Africa ."

Emmett and Rosalie went to Africa to celebrate their honeymoon, again. We had told everyone that they were at Dartmouth with Jasper. They had gone while Jasper stayed here with Alice .

"Emmett wanted to be here."

"But…Rosalie?"

Ah, Rosalie. My blond sister still despised Bella, because I found her more beautiful. Carlisle had meant for Rosalie to be my mate but I didn't want her and her envious thoughts. "I know Bella. Don't worry, she will be on her best behavior."

* * *

** I am sorry about the cliff hanger. i hate them but it's where i stopped and i'm sorry. please spare me. Reveiw let me know what you want to see. Especially when he leaves that will be a fun time. he he. Next up is the party and Edward's big decision.**

**XOXO lot's of love,**

**Kat**

**visit me at . **


	3. PLEASE READ IMPORTANT

This is not an update. I am looking for either a co-writer or a beta. I can not update like I would like to because of school and work but I can get enough written that I just need a little help. So please anyone interested please please contact me. I will keep my eyes open for any help. If you need to email me directly feel free. I will be in contact with all those interested ASAP.

Thank you thank you thank you,

Love you lots and lots,

Katrina… 3


	4. Disaster

**Hey everyone I am so terribly sorry about the long delay. I hope to try and write more, but college applications are no fun. Please enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns.**

* * *

**Chapter 3: Disaster**

When I pulled up to the house, I heard her groan in displeasure. I smirked. Alice had covered the whole front porch in candles and decorations. We walked up to the front door and as I opened it Bella gasped looking around. I smiled keeping my arm around her. She hugged Esme and Carlisle tightly.

"We tried to reign Alice in," Carlisle whispered.

_Get her over here Edward,_ Alice growled at me. I laughed to myself and pulled Bella to Alice.

"Happy birthday Bella," Alice chirped.

"Alice, this isn't necessary."

Alice glared at her. "It is necessary. Presents!" She grabbed the first box. "This is from Emmett, Jasper, and Rosalie."

Bella shook the box slightly and opened it. The confused look on her face was comical. She stared at the brown cardboard, trying to take in the letters. Jasper laughed and Rosalie smiled amused. _Stupid human._ I glared at her. She rolled her eyes. _Just kidding Edward_. She started humming in her mind like Alice does.

"It's a radio Bella," Jasper explained. "Emmett is installing it right now."

"Thank you," she whispered and then shouted to Emmett, "Thank you!"

Emmett laughed loudly.

Alice exchanged the empty box for the flat silver package from me. "This is from Edward and myself."

Bella glared at me. "You promised."

"I swear not a dime," I said kissing her forehead.

She sighed and jerked her finger under the crease of the wrapping. A warm, alluring floral scent filled the air. Fresh, undiluted blood. _MINE!! _Jasper and the monster in me shouted. I cut off my sense of smell and stood in front of Bella, shoving her back lightly. A loud crash sounded behind me, but my attention was focused on Jasper's body colliding with mine. His teeth snapped close to my neck and face. I held him off tightly. Carlisle ordered Emmett and Rosalie to take Jasper away. His wild eyes never left Bella. I growled. Emmett's arm held Jasper tightly, actually using his strength. Rosalie helped lead him out. Esme followed shouting sorry to Bella.

"Edward, I need to get to her," Carlisle whispered.

I nodded and backed away, still not breathing.

"Let's move her to the kitchen," he said, tightening the tourniquet.

I picked Bella up lightly.

"Edward go check on Jasper," Carlisle ordered.

Bella looked at me. "You don't have to be here."

I looked to Alice she nodded. "You're the only one he'll listen to."

Alice watched Bella as I walked out. _She'll be fine, _she thought. I couldn't believe her thoughts. I paused and listened for Jasper. His remorse could be heard everywhere I followed till his thoughts were loud and clear.

"Jasper," I whispered looking around.

He dropped to the ground next to me. "Edward, I couldn't help it."

"Believe me, it was easier for you," I replied grimly.

"I'm sorry," he groaned, internally yelling at himself. _Dumb ass. You are so stupid. Alice doesn't deserve you._

"No, Jazz, the only monster here is me," I said mechanically.

"Edward, you are not a monster," Esme scolded. "What would Bella say?"

"Esme, she got hurt because of me!" I glared at the ground. "I'm killing her! I am the only monster."

"She's fine," Alice chimed in. "Carlisle is sewing her up and she'll be fine."

"I could have killed her today," I shouted. "I wanted to so very badly. I wanted to take her right then and there. It was worse because of what we are. She is human and doesn't deserve a selfish monster like me."

"Edward," Esme murmured touching my arm. "We were all there, you wouldn't have hurt her, you love her too much."

"Yeah and now we have to leave," I said in a rough retort.

"No!" Alice cried. "You can't make me leave. Bella needs us. Edward don't do this to her! Don't do this to yourself!"

"Alice you must. After I take her home tonight you will all go to Alaska till we know where to go," I stopped.

"What about you?" Rosalie hissed. "Do you get to stay with the _human_?"

"For a few days Rose, yes I'm staying then when I get her to let go I'll join you all," I said, pain icing my frozen heart.

"But–" Alice began.

"No," I growled. "She may be your best friend but the future is changed. I told you I would change it. She will stay human, she will live."

Alice swore under her breath and walked away with Jasper following slowly. Esme followed me back to the house while Emmett and Rose went to keep Jasper away. I heard in his mind all the pain he was causing himself and knew that leaving was for the best. I was about to walk in when I heard Carlisle and Bella talking.

"I looked at Edward. Sick as he was, he was still beautiful. There was something pure and good about his face. The kind of face I would have wanted my son to have." He paused and I knew that he was telling Bella the story I tried to hide. Then he continued. "After all those years of indecision, I simply acted on a whim. I wheeled his mother to the morgue first, and then I came back for him. No one noticed that he was still breathing. There weren't enough hands, enough eyes, to keep track of half of what the patients needed. The morgue was empty – of the living, at least. I stole him out the back door, and carried him across the rooftops back to my home."

I cringed and silenced their conversation from my mind. I stared out into the trees, listen for a key word. It came faster than I had anticipated.

"I suppose I should take you home now," Carlisle murmured.

I walked in the back doors and entered through the dining room. "I'll do that."

I walked slowly. I kept my face expressionless as I stepped into view. Bella stared at my face in horror, but she too masked it well. I felt like breaking down there, staring at the fragile human girl who loved me without reason. She stared down looking as if it were her fault she was hurt.

"Carlisle can take me," she whispered, and then looked down at her shirt covered in blood as if pointing out that I couldn't handle it.

"I'm fine," I replied flatly. "You'll need to change anyway. You'd give Charlie a heart attack the way you look. I'll have Alice get you something."

I left just as Bella said, "He's very upset."

I went out to look for Alice. She was sitting under a tree looking hurt. "Alice."

She glared at me. "What now, Edward?"

"I need you to get Bella something to wear," I said emotionlessly.

"You don't deserve to say her name," she growled. Alice bounded up and followed me back to the house. We walked in through the back doors. Alice went straight to Bella, while I stayed by the wall.

"C'mon," Alice murmured. _I'm doing this for her, not you. _"I'll get you something less macabre to wear."

The headed upstairs and into Esme and Carlisle's room. I walked in and stood by the front door. I heard Bella's shirt hit the floor as Alice helped her change. I tried not to watch to give them privacy but I couldn't help it. Just as I was about to close my mind to Alice, Bella looked up at her.

_"Alice," _she whispered as they went to the door.

Alice looked down at Bella. _"Yes?"_

_"How bad is it?"_

Images of the argument to come flashed into her head. _"I'm not sure yet."_

_"How's Jasper?"_

I growled and Alice sighed. _"He's very unhappy with himself. It's all so much more of a challenge for him, and he hates feeling weak."_

Bella cringed, guilt glazing her eyes. _"It's not his fault. You'll tell him that I'm not mad at him, not at all, won't you?"_

_"Of course."_

They walked into view. Alice was glaring at me. Bella stared wide-eyed and scared. I flinched internally. I held the door open for her as soon as she reached the bottom of the stairs. Bella was about to walk out when Alice freaked.

"Take your things!" She picked up the presents and Bella's camera off the floor and placed them in Bella's good arm. "You can thank me later, when you've opened them." _She will thank me Edward._

I flashed her a hard look behind Bella's back but then closed my face when she turned to me. Esme and Carlisle said goodbye, staring at me worried. I blew them off by walking outside with Bella. She walked quickly down the stairs to get away from the horror. I followed her at the same pace staying quiet. When we reached the truck I opened the door for her silently. She climbed in just as quiet. I saw her rip the red ribbon Emmett had tied to the stereo off and throw it to the floor. I climbed in the drivers side and started the truck. I drove down the driveway pushing the internal limit of her truck.

"Say something," she begged as I turned onto the freeway.

I didn't look at her. "What do you want me to say?"

"Tell me you forgive me," she whispered.

I looked at her, angry that she was taking this on herself. "Forgive _you_? For what?"

"If I'd been more careful, nothing would have happened," she said, accusing herself.

"Bella," I murmured. "You gave yourself a paper cut – that hardly deserves the death penalty."

"It's still my fault," she said sibilantly.

"Your fault?" I growled. "If you'd cut yourself at Mike Newton's house, with Jessica there and Angela and your other normal friends, the worst that could possibly have happened would be what? Maybe they couldn't find you a bandage? If you'd tripped and knocked over a pile of glass plates on your own – without someone throwing you into them – even then, what's the worst? You'd get blood on the seats when they drove you to the emergency room? Mike Newton would have held your hand while they stitched you up – and he wouldn't be fighting the urged to kill you the whole time he was there. Don't try to take any of this on yourself, Bella. It will only make me more disgusted with myself."

"How the hell did Mike Newton end up in this conversation?" she growled at me.

"Mike Newton ended up in this conversation because Mike Newton would be a hell of a lot healthier for you to be with," I hissed.

"I'd rather die than be with Mike Newton," she argued. "I'd rather die than be with anyone but you."

"Don't be so melodramatic, please."

"Well then, don't you be ridiculous," she countered.

I didn't answer. I stared out the window. I hated myself. She deserved better than this, better than me. I pulled up to her house and cut the engine. I kept my hands tight around the fragile steering wheel. She would go inside and I'd disappear. Perceptively forever.

"Will you stay tonight?" she asked quietly.

_Yes I'd love to stay with you. _"I should go home."

"For my birthday," she pleaded.

She would be the death of me. "You can't have it both ways – either you want people to ignore your birthday or you don't. One or the other."

She sighed, relieved. "Okay. I've decided that I don't want you to ignore my birthday. I'll see you upstairs."

Deep in my heart I was rejoicing but this could never end well. She climbed out and reached for the presents. I frowned. "You don't have to take those."

"I want them," she said, pulling the presents out.

"No you don't," I whispered. "Carlisle and Esme spent money on you."

"I'll live." She tucked the presents under her good arm and closed the door. I stood next to her in a quarter of a second.

"Let me carry them, at least," I offered, removing the gifts from under her arm. "I'll be in your room."

"Thanks," she said smiling.

"Happy birthday," I said, sighing.

I leaned down and pressed my lips to her soft warm lips. She stood up on the balls of her feet holding our lips together longer. I pulled away and smiled at her and then I ran to her room. I climbed through her window as she explained to Charlie what her party was like, except the horror of almost being killed by vampires. I shuddered. How could I break it to her easy? Maybe I would stay longer. _No_, I yelled at myself. _You'll never leave if you don't do it now_. I heard her walking upstairs but she headed towards the bathroom as she always did. I picked up the present I had given her, still wrapped in its silver paper. The hard case spun in my hands. I looked up just as the door opened. She stared at me. I tried to stare back solemnly but I was so distraught I could feel my control slipping.

"Hi," I whispered sadly.

She walked up to me and pushed the present out of my hands and sat down in my lap, leaning her warm head to my chest. "Hi," she murmured. "Can I open my presents now?"

She's enthusiastic? "Where did the enthusiasm come from?"

"You made me curious," she said shrugging.

I handed her Esme and Carlisle's present. I unwrapped it quickly. She stared at it for a minute, reading what it said.

"We're going to Jacksonville?"

"Only if you want to," I said softly.

She nodded and reached for my present. I, again, unwrapped it for her. She looked at the silver disk, a faint smile on her lips. I put the CD into her player and hit play. Her song started. We sat for a moment and listened. Tears glistened in her eyes. I put her under the covers and held her.

"It's still my birthday," she whispered.

I kissed her with everything I had. This was goodbye after all. I pushed my limits for this last kiss. My lips moved with hers as if they never wanted to part. Within a fortnight, I would be gone.

* * *

**Ooh so we all know what happens next. I hope that this isn't too much of a complication for me to finish. I am on a search for a beta reader just a heads up. So what did you all think? Did I get into Edward's (and Jasoer's and Roaslie's) head? Review. **

**Love ya,**

**Kat **


	5. Hunting Dusk Playlist

**Okay so this is my playlist for my story. Sorry for making y'all think I updated twice.**

"Endlessly, She Said" – A.F.I. (Edward Cullen)

"It's Not Supposed To Go Like That" – Rascal Flatts (Alice Cullen)

"Two Is Better Than One" – Boys Like Girls feat. Taylor Swift (Edward Cullen and Bella Swan)

"The Kind" – Flyleaf (Edward Cullen)

"Girl With Golden Eyes" – Sixx A.M. (Edward Cullen)

"Hold On To The Nights" – Richard Marx (Edward Cullen)

"Home" – Michael Buble (Edward Cullen)

"The Kill" – 30 Seconds To Mars (Edward Cullen)

"Schizophrenic Conversations" – Staind (Edward Cullen)

"Breaking The Habit" – Linkin Park (Edward Cullen)

"My Own Worst Enemy" – Lit (Edward Cullen)

"Hear Me Now" – Framing Hanley (Edward Cullen)

"Love Story" – Taylor Swift (Bella Swan)

"Get Out Alive" – Three Days Grace (Edward Cullen)

"Broken" – Seether feat. Amy Lee (Edward Cullen and Bella Swan)

"What's This Life For" – Creed (Edward Cullen)

"(Taking My) Life Away" – Default (Edward Cullen)

"Keep Your Hands Off My Girl" – Good Charlotte (Edward Cullen and Jacob Black)

"Get Busy Living or Get Busy Dying (Do your Part To save The Scene and Stop Going To The Shows)" – Fall Out Boy (Edward Cullen)

"It Is You (I Have Loved)" – Dana Glover (Edward Cullen and Bella Swan)

"True" – Spandau Ballet (Edward Cullen)

"Like I Love You" – Amy Grant (Edward Cullen)

"Points of Authority" – Linkin Park (Edward Cullen)

"Thunder" – Boys Like Girls (Edward Cullen)


End file.
